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Things Black FAMILIES Don’t Do

If you take care of a wound it heals, right? Sometimes as if nothing was ever there. However, ignore it and it will become infected, never heal maybe even spread. In this instance, wounds aren't the physical kind you can't touch or see. These are the kind you feel, emotional ones. The kind that'll take over and leave you drowning in self hate depression addictions of all kinds. Most times loved ones cut you the deepest.

Sometimes a simple yet genuine apology or conversation can start the healing. However, growing up or even as adults & being black. those apologies are few and far between. I honestly not even sure why. I know however if you're black and reading this, you've had an experience in which you had it out with a family member or friend. In black families when that happens we just stop talking. Could be days even months however long an apology never comes. Just one day without warning your speaking again. No discussion no apology, no healing. Just speaking again. You feel hurt all over again. The anger and frustration grows in your stomach. I love being Black, it's one of my biggest blessings, but I hate that toxic trait we carry from generation to generation. It's traumatic.

Many think apologizing is an admission of guilt. It's easy to misunderstand separating actions from character. Just because you do something bad or wrong doesn't make you a bad person. Apologizing can open the gate to shame and no one wants to feel bad about themselves.

Whatever the reason, it's toxic ass behavior. Opening up and apologizing can actually be therapeutic or even empowering. On the receiving end, an apology can start the healing process. Life does in fact move on. With or without a reconciliation. As hurtful as it is it's real. Honestly, you don't need an apology because you can continue life. You will continue your life. Forgive yourself for thinking people have the same heart as you do. Healing is life-changing and euphoric. Once you're 100% honest with yourself you'll be surprised what you can accomplish within yourself without an apology. Give yourself your own permission to heal.


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